Before we get to Round 3, though, we have a ~Bonus Stage~!!

Thinking about it now, this may well be the first scrolling brawler to have a minor tradition of the genre, a bonus stage for extra points. Before the days of the car destruction from Final Fight and the barrel busting of The Punisher, there was this, a boxing match between two cartoon ducks being refereed by Colonel Sanders. The controls are slightly different here, with your jump replaced with a mostly useless 'dodge' move, and your charge punch only going up to its second level. The CPU Pin you encounter in solo mode is ruthless and will almost certainly win the first time you play this, but if you're playing with a friend, you get a fight to the death, Double Dragon style! Just knock 'em out, friendship be damned, OK?



Round 3 is the Jungle. Which Jungle? Couldn't tell ya.



The difficulty starts ratcheting up a notch from here, as while there's just a group of dogs at the start, you'll mostly have to contend with mortar and homing missile attacks, and the alligators have come back too. There's a homing launcher early on that isn't quite as useless as you'd think, as it's good for clearing out the dog packs, but you'll definitely have to watch out for the bottom of the screen- not every platform here has barriers, and the bridges definitely don't. Be sure not to have too nice a trip, otherwise we'll see you next fall. Oh, and you'll find a rocket launcher at the base of some stairs which you should grab before the boss fight, but don't go up the stairs- there's treasure chests there, but also lots of moles. Nope.



The mid-boss this time is probably the largest in the game- a stone golem, ready to crush you puny ducks into the pavement soft, fertile jungle soil. It marches very, very slowly on screen and has some basic punching attacks alongside the ability to spit fire. The good news is that you don't have to destroy every stone that makes up the golem- just one of the two bottom ones, which makes the whole golem collapse. The bad news is this boss, more than any other, highlights the weird collision detection in the game- when it looks like you're clear from being punched by this thing, you're still gonna get punched. Sorry. Your best bet is to attack when it's moving, then back away and let it attack then go on the offensive again, and repeat. It also helps if you grabbed the rocket launcher- aim true!



The upper route is definitely the easier of the two here, but you're still going to have to make a real choice here. While both of them having homing missile dogs, mortar kangaroos and alligators, the upper route has bridges you can fall off. That said, the majority of the enemies are just sausage deer, and you start the area off with some bombs, so you can take them out pretty easily. However, the weapon selection is meager- the bombs are pretty much it beyond a homing launcher. The lower route, on the other hand, has a flamethrower and a machine gun, but also has a full stretch of nothing but moles, and while the machine gun is handy for the section just before the boss, you'll have a hard time hanging on to the damn thing. If you wanna risk it, it's up to you, but I'd just take the upper route to keep things easy.



After the paths merge, there's a very brief section with two lines of homing missile dogs- the second set of them all hide food items, so be sure to take them out- and then some fire geysers. The only thing you can do is just run past them and do your best to avoid the flames- they lock onto your last position and they sting- because it's time for the boss!



Just a ring of fire. Of course. This is another battle where you'll be supplied with a water pistol as you still can't put fires out with your fists. On paper this one sounds tougher than the giant flame as it actually moves around and fires flames at you, but it's fairly easy to outrun and it doesn't spew out flames nearly as often. Also, it takes far less punishment before giving up- you only need to hit each flame on the ring once to snuff it out. The approach is similar to the giant fire, really- keep moving and use the eight-direction attack system to keep pelting it with water shots until it gives up. No problem, really!



Our next location is... Chicago. Which is it, Achacha, your own bizarro world or the real world? Pick one!



This round has only one new enemy at the start, football-playing rhinos (that's the American style of football, not the other kind) who, I suppose, are supposed to be charging you- when they get close, they'll dive- but they're pretty slow about it. There's also the return of the roller-skating cats to compliment them, and later on a row of homing-missile dogs. What's neat about this round is that it actually does interesting stuff with something that's been neglected for most of the game- the background. It's only little things, but you can climb the stairs in the background that usually lead to treasure chests, and you can also stand on the oil drums where some enemies actually sit and launch mortar fires at you. It's not much, but it's something, just a shame the game doesn't do more with it. It also does something pretty annoying- get hit in a certain way and dropped weapons will fly over objects in the background and fall off the stage entirely. Gah! The other thing you'll really notice here is the homing-missile can't alter its height once fired- there's a few stairs here and if you fire at the top of them, it won't hit any enemies below. Important safety tip, that.



Anyway, the next boss is a giant star, and to be honest this boss is just a real pain. It starts circling very, very slowly and will pelt you with stars aimed in your general direction, but as you hit it, it gets smaller and the circle pattern in moves in gets wider and wider, and it fires way more stars than you can really handle. There's a couple of things you can do to make things easier, mostly save your homing-missile rounds for this fight (just remember to jump before you fire!) and keep moving- lamp it with charge-up punches then get on the opposite side. Might not help too much, but it's all you've got for this one!



The route split this time definitely leans towards the top route, even if it has what counts as the only puzzle in the entire game. On the upper route there's more stationary hazards in the form of pillars of fire flanked by homing-missile dogs. The puzzle is a seemingly-impassable set of flames... What you need to do is jump on top of the mailbox just in front of it to pass. Again, this round does some weird stuff with platforms and background items, it's a shame none of the other rounds do! The lower rote has a lot more enemies, including some annoyingly-placed mortar kangaroos, and while there's a flamethrower that's very handy to have in a segment stuffed with roller-skating cats, the main problem here is there's so many enemies that losing your weapon is far, far easier and more frustrating than on the upper route.



The bottom route also has some strange bits. First, jumping on some of the oil drums pans the camera up so that you can see a homing missile launcher... That, apparently, you can never obtain. Even punching the building won't do it. The other thing is an unusual enemy that only appears twice in the entire game- a flying bomb that, once you get close enough, explodes into green globs of goo that cover the top and bottom segments of the screen. Jump as it explodes and stuck in the middle and you'll be fine, as if you're too close to the bottom you'll get hit by the explosion. Don't worry, people who took the upper route won't miss out- another one appears just before the boss.



And the boss this time is... Oh. Hello again, giant flame.

You fight him the same way as you did in Round 1, water pistols and all.

Yawn.

The best boss in the ENTIRE GAME is on the next page! We promise!